What is a Mother Blessing, you ask? A Mother Blessing is a form of a Blessingway, which is a special ceremony designed to acknowledge, honor and celebrate a journey, in other words, a blessing of the way. For women, a Mother Blessing is a celebration of a woman’s journey into motherhood (whether the first time or the fifth, by birth or by adoption/surrogacy). As she prepares to birth new life, her friends and loved ones encircle her with love and support. It is a time for her to express any fears she may be having in a safe space while being pampered. Some mothers have chosen to expressly work on an issue they’re having during this time, such as blending families, VBAC, specific fears, worries about being good mothers, etc.
I recently facilitated a Mother Blessing for a friend and client of mine. This is the third one I’ve done, and I’m always surprised by how different they are and how much I learn with each one. These events, in my opinion, are crucial in building a woman up to do the hard work of mothering. Too often as mothers, as women, we are not appreciated simply for being what we are. A Mother Blessing is a celebration of just that. While many baby showers focus only on the baby, many Mother Blessings are only about the mother. This stark contrast belies, to me, an undercurrent in our society that pregnancy/labor/birth/motherhood are no big deal. These events in our lives are, in fact, the biggest deal EVER. While they may not define us, they do completely change who we are and how we think. Because of their monumental importance, they deserve special treatment. For some women, during pregnancy is the only time they feel beautiful and whole, the only time they are treated special.
There are some elements that remain consistent with each one, but many elements change depending on the woman’s personal tastes and preferences. Two of the constant elements are those of honoring and pampering the woman. Pampering may consist of washing her feet, brushing her hair, bestowing pampering gifts such as lotion or bath salts, and placing a flower wreath upon her head. Honoring may consist of gift giving, telling the woman her strengths that you admire, bringing a special bead or charm for a necklace or bracelet, and offering postpartum assistance.
One of the keys to a meaningful Mother Blessing is having the mother choose only those people she feels completely comfortable with. These ceremonies have a tendency to be very powerful, both energetically and emotionally. They are best shared with dearest friends and close family members.
There are many sites on the internet that discuss Mother Blessings and how to have one. A resource I found particularly helpful was the book Mother Rising: The Blessingway Journey into Motherhood. Check them out!